Wednesday, February 15, 2012

A Zombie Hunter Valentine

Nothing says "Baby, I totally trust and love you..." to your special lady than getting her a trusty AXE.

Why an axe? Let me count the ways:
  • It is one of the best zombie killing weapons
  • The axe is very easy to use. Only basic training is required!
  • Requires minimal maintenance
  • Quite affordable & easy to find
  • They come in a wide variety to suit her discerning taste
  • It shows that you have absolute trust in her (that she will use it on zeds, and not on you)
  • Great for all kinds of yard work
           Plus many other functions! 

    The Zombie Hunter's Recipe for Romance

    A romantic dinner for two
    1 bottle of bubbly 
    2 hour back and foot massage
    1 bouquet of flowers
    +1 trusty axe that is nicely gift-wrapped

    Do all of these to score big this Valentine's Day!

    When the world finally plunges into a zombie apocalypse, she will definitely appreciate your thoughtfulness!

    Stay vigilant!

    Friday, February 10, 2012


    Sweet dreams?

    Darn it, these bed sheets are really cool. Kinda sets the mood for a romantic evening don't it?

    Imagine of a dark room with incense. There's a thunderstorm going outside. You've got candles and eerie music. The Bram Stoker's: Dracula soundtrack will do. Won't the creeping hands make you and your special lady feel the urge to cling to each other for safety?

    It can also make a nice set for your kid's room. He or she could overcome the fear of the walking dead at a young age. "they're just zombies baby"

    Surprise your special lady with this snazzy set.  Find out more over here at 

    Stay vigilant!

    Thank you Geek Alerts!

    Sunday, February 5, 2012

    Boracay Island: Zombies in Paradise?

     click to zoom into happiness

    With great reluctance, I have returned from my vacation at the magical island of Boracay

    The weather was perfect, the water crystal clear, powdery white sand, and grilled seafood & beer within arm's reach for about more than a week. Too bloody short. I wish I could live here someday and run a survival school of some kind. I'd wear dreadlocks and throw away my shoes & shirts forever.

    My family had a swell time. Mrs. Zombie Hunter was pleased with her swimwear and got a mild tan.  The little one built sandcastles and swam all day. Both are important survival skills which I hope she'll never need to use.

    There's nothing like a well-deserved break from the drudgery of urban life to recharge you. I think I'll make this a yearly thing!

    Check out the water in the photo above.  It defines tranquility. Look at it, can you feel your blood pressure going down? Swimming in it recharged my soul. 

    And then I begin to remember the reality of a zombie apocalypse that threatens to take away all things that are sunny, wholesome, and beautiful. WTSHTF on a global scale, even this island paradise would get all messed up. 

    The tourism industry will work against it. According to last year's census, there were nearly a million tourists who visited the island last year. Mostly South Koreans, Taiwanese, Russians, Americans, Brits, and those funky Australians who dominate the big water-sport events. Lots of fun they are.

    Unfortunately, the sheer amount of people visiting the island plus the population that supports the industry can act as a magnet for zombie infection.

    As for its geography, the island itself has no natural barriers. When the dead walk the Earth, they can easily migrate from one of our country's 7,100 islands to this little slice of sandy heaven.

    I keep getting this sort of  buzz-kill vision everywhere I go.

    I had a real hard time trying to FORGET about zombies even for just a few hours. Weighing heavily on my mind was the well-being of my family and all of you survivalists.

    WTSHTF, I'll build or commandeer one of these boats called a Vinta and sail with my family to safety. Perfect for island hopping and its durability in bad weather is proven. I could catch fish every day, and it ain't hard in these waters. There are coconuts everywhere, sometimes floating in the water waiting to refresh you.

    So I'm back. With a tan. I'm re-united with my blasted office laptop whipping up new survival strategies to share with ya'll.

    When the zombie war is won, and millions of walking dead are but a fading memory, you guys know where a former zombie hunter will be spending his early retirement.

    Stay vigilant!